Big Church = Big School

There is a classic argument about whether big churches are missing some intrinsic quality of a 'real' church. Proponents of smaller churches point out that they are more intimate, less focused on finances and more community oriented. Big church supporters point out that their better quality worship music can increase intimacy with God, that smaller churches are often unable to help others because they are cash-poor and that a bigger church has more people involved in every section of the community, from young to old, rich to poor.

It's an old argument, and one that has little scriptural basis for a decision either way. Jesus did not specify a church size, but he did deal with different size groups in different ways, from the crowds that followed him, to his close followers, his group of disciples and then individuals like Peter or Mary. The book of Acts talks about the different size churches, and historians tell us that some of them were quite large (in the thousands).

My take on this (currently) is that the big vs small church debate is much like the big vs small school debate. By this I don't mean that big schools are just like big churches, but rather the comparison of the relative merits of size for schools and churches is similarly loaded.

Some people want their kids at a small school, other like the resources available in a larger school. Some think a small school will encourage more mingling of kids, others think a larger school will help their kids find a niche for them. The debate then passes onto class sizes, styles of classroom, and so on ad infinitum ...

But let's be sensible for a moment, most of these issues fall into the "it depends" bucket. When is a school big? Well it depends upon the seize of the local community, the range of years the school covers, and what other local schools are like. When is big bad? Well it depends upon what you consider the best thing for your children at their current stage of life. Etcetera.

I think most people are most affected in this area by their own good/bad experiences, certainly I am. I went to a very large boarding school and hated it, I went to a smaller day school and loved it, when younger I went to a very small day school and found it boring ... so guess where I fall when it comes to debates about big vs small, and boarding vs day? However, my two youngest brothers loved boarding school - so I figure they will have a different point of view than me.

People seem to back big, or small, churches because of the same cognitive bias. Their experiences inform them of which they would prefer, and that becomes their default 'ideal' size. Some people take this to an extreme and formulate complicated theological explanations for why their preference is the 'right' one. Piffle.

Personally I think you've got to find a church you're willing to commit to, one where there is some accountability (both ways). That means taking into account the needs of all your family. It also means being willing to forgive when someone offends you, or being able to bend when someone imposes on you, and it certainly means allowing yourself to feel underwhelmed with church from time to time. Big or small, all churches are likely to confront you with similar issues - unless the church is so small that it's basically just your family (in which case it will have its own set of flaws). My advice? Choose your church like you would your kids' schools, by weighing the pros and cons, and then being willing to stick with that decision for the good of you all.